Songs in the key of life

I hate it when the news starts to be a bit like Therebeforelight. Suddenly Nabokov’s a lepidopterist and Salinger loved Tim Henman. Marquez probably had a crippling horror of chemists. I don’t like it. Please, everyone stop being sideways.

So, when all else fails resort to silly songs. Five of my favourites.

1. In the Bath. There’s very little in life not encompassed by the opening couplet. Anyone actually reading this in the bath ought to feel so at one with the world you temporarily cease sponging.

2. Nagasaki. Yes, it’s a song about seafarers going to Japanese brothels. I can’t remember if the Django version has this bit in it, but “heaven help a sailor on a night like this” is one of the finest lyrics in all silly songs everywhere.

3. Who’s Next? About a dozen Tom Leher songs could have made the cut, but, as you’ve noticed, I’m a sucker for a half-rhyming couplet. “The Lord’s my shepherd says the psalm, but just in case… we better get a bomb.

4. Minnie the Moocher. The second of my silly songs to have featured in Jeeves and Wooster. Legend has it all the hi di hi di hi, ho di ho di ho business first came about because he forgot the words. I choose to believe that.

5. I’ve Lost My Horn (or whatever the hell it’s called). It’s another tongue-twisting, Flanders and Swann one, to the tune of Mozart’s Horn Concerto. Puff out your cheeks and go “pa pa pa pa.”

I appreciate that this has been Therebeforelight’s equivalent of a clip show, but that’s what the world get’s for making me feel like the 10 o’clock news is being made in my ears. It’s scary, and I’m not coming out of this cupboard until it thinks about what it’s done.

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~ by David Thorley on January 28, 2011.

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